Report: Biden Doesn’t Remember Signing Up For Election, But “Willing To Go With It” If “Armenia” Is

After last night it’s now apparent – Joe Biden is quickly snuffing out competition from Bernie Sanders. Biden managed to win Michigan, Mississippi, and Missouri, and managed to win even in Idaho, where Sanders appeared strong.

The democratic nomination is Biden’s to lose. And so too, apparently, is his cognitive function.

“I’m going to be honest with you my fellow Armenians. I don’t remember walking on this stage, signing up for this election, or getting to this country. But if you’re willing to have me, I’m willing to go with it,” said the leading democratic candidate.

The confusion began with the Biden’s supporters being addressed as “Armenians” instead of “Americans” and didn’t stop there. Following his victory on Tuesday night, Biden went on to ramble about things ranging from Tapioca cups to his grandchildren never visiting, seemingly mistaking his press conference for a senior home located in the country of Armenia. Despite this, he remained vaguely aware that the people there were supporting him in being elected for something.

“I’m proud to see so many faces that look just like mine out there tonight. I promise, I will make all of you proud come November. That bingo night is ours!” Biden said to his supporters. A few supporters realized they made a grave mistake, and murmurs could be heard of them wondering if it was too late to vote Bernie.

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